I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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