it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
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