i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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