Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
