i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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