so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
