After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Randomize
