Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
