So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Randomize
