i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
