did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
