We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize