I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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