i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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