i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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