Nicole vs. Life
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i will never coherently bang her
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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