4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
high people should be assigned attendants
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
