And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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