The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
