bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
