Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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