What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
