What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize