Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
