I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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