That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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