Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
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