She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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