would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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