It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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