I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Little spoons don't ask big questions
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
