party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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