Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
