so that wasnt chicken after all
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
