I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
