i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
