pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
