she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
