He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
