don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
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