I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize