Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Randomize
