the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
