I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
