Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
