i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Randomize
