Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
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