i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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