I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
