Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Randomize
